Mystery Man

You know that guy you occasionally see around the classroom buildings or running out of his dorm because he’s late to class again. You’re not even sure if he knows your name, but you’ve never put much thought toward it. He’s never done anything to catch your eye. Plus, you have a million and one things to worry about that are more important than some guy you barely notice. If it weren’t for that one unexpected IM, I might have never known Joe Anderson (alias to protect the innocent), my mystery man, even existed.

I don’t know what it is about the instant messaging phenomenon. It gives us a weird sense of confidence most of us wouldn’t have face to face. I often catch myself saying rash things over AIM that I would never have had the guts to say in person, or even over the phone. AIM serves as a façade of confidence and a convenient way to talk to people you would normally never be caught dead speaking to. My AIM buddy list consists of my best friends from middle school and the guy I have a crush on, as well as my cousin’s boyfriend, and some of those nerdy kids you don’t talk to in public but who are genuinely nicer than your closest group of friends. You never really expect to ever talk to them, but they still stay on your buddy list.

I had never expected Joe Anderson to even know my name, but things changed in an instant. “Hey Taryn, what’s up?” read the IM that suddenly flashed onto my computer screen. I tried to think of what to say back, but I was stunned, staring at the computer screen as if I had seen a ghost. He was a senior, I was a sophomore. My hands, quivering, darted every which way on my keyboard, typing in meaningless small talk and a couple ha-ha’s now and then. We ended up talking that whole night, until it was lights out. We picked up the conversation the next night in the same spot. This continued for the remainder of the week. One night he helped me through a personal issue, which led me to realize that this was the time to exchange numbers so we could talk at any point during the day, not just from 9:30 until lights out. For a sophomore girl in high school, one-and-a-half hours is not even close to enough time to discuss all the issues. As soon as I knew it we were connected through at least four different technologies: Facebook, texting, iChat, video chat. We talked practically every day, but never once in person.

I know, you’re probably thinking he wanted to talk to me because he likes me, right? Well, Joe has a girlfriend, Kelly (alias to protect the innocent), and she’s as pretty as she is popular. So that couldn’t be the reason. My friends tell me the whole thing is a little creepy, but for some reason, I don’t think it is at all. I occasionally bump into him on campus, but not a word is spoken between us face to face. We’re like best friends while video chatting or texting, but if we see each other in person, it’s as if he never knew my name.

Joe and I have an unspoken code under which we can tell each other anything, and we don’t judge each other for what we have done. The truth is, if we talked in person it would make the situation a lot more awkward, and I wouldn’t be as honest as I am over chat or texting. The mask of communicating online and through texts is a way to escape from the awkwardness of truth and feel more confident about yourself. Knowing that you have someone you can tell anything without them thinking any less of you gives you self-confidence, and we all know that’s what every teenage girl needs.